“I have never been so mad at myself,” Ronnie says to her friend, who is sitting next to her on the couch.
“What happened?” Ella inquires as she moves towards her coffee.
“I was sorting through my closet, trying to find something to wear for today’s night. I started looking at all of the clothes in my closet but I didn’t think anything looks good on me, then I went into the dresser and started going through the clothes there but didn’t find anything that will make me look perfect.” Ronnie replies.
“It’s not so bad. It is impossible to be perfect all of the time.” Ella notices. “I keep telling myself that it’s not humanly possible.”
Ronnie shakes her head no at this idea and continues with what she was saying in a slightly clipped tone, “I felt like everything I have was wrong, not the right body shape, not the right clothes, and even not the right way to please my partner. Like I had nothing perfect and all this led to me just focusing on my imperfections during the sex rather than enjoying it. I hardly felt fully satisfied. When can I be perfect? When can I enjoy freely and fully?
Women are often perfectionists. We aspire to have the ideal bodies, the ideal jobs, and the ideal relationships. But what if we let go of that perfectionism? What if we allowed ourselves to be imperfect? It turns out, letting go of perfectionism can lead to better sex.
Perfectionism is a nasty beast. It’s also a sneaky one: It often lurks in the darker corners of our minds, waiting to strike when we’re feeling most vulnerable and self-critical. Perfectionism saps your confidence and makes you afraid to fail in any way that might be visible to other people.
Readers know this, too. In response to our Perfect Sex Survey, hundreds of individuals have shared how perfectionism has eroded their ability to enjoy sex in a healthy way.
In this blog post, we’ll explore why that is and how women can let go of their perfectionism to enjoy a more fulfilling sex life. It will introduce you to the sneaky ways perfectionism can hurt your ability to enjoy sex, share tips for recognizing when perfectionism is sabotaging you, and offer advice for becoming more comfortable with imperfection.
DOES PERFECTIONISM AFFECT SEX FOR WOMEN?
Perfectionism can have a negative effect on sex for women in a number of ways. When we’re constantly worrying about making mistakes or not measuring up, it takes a toll on our mental and physical health.
- For one, if a woman is constantly worrying about whether she looks good enough or is good enough in bed, she’s not going to be able to relax and enjoy the experience.
- Additionally, perfectionism can lead to performance anxiety, which can make it difficult for a woman to reach orgasm. This is one of the biggest problems with perfectionism that it can lead to anxiety and stress.
- If a woman is unable to let go of her perfectionism and relax during sex, it can be a frustrating and unenjoyable experience for both her and her partner.
- Perfectionism has also been linked to sexual dysfunction. Women who are perfectionists often have difficulty relaxing and enjoying sex because they’re so focused on performance.
HOW WOMEN CAN RELAX IN THE BEDROOM DURING SEX?
It can be tough for women to relax and let go of their perfectionism in the bedroom, but it’s important to do so if they want to enjoy better sex.
- One way to relax is to focus on the sensations you’re feeling rather than what you look like.
- Another is to experiment with different types of touch and find what feels good for you.
- You can also try focusing on your breathing or even making some noise during sex.
- The most important thing is to communicate with your partner and let them know what you need in order to feel relaxed.
STRATEGIES FOR WOMEN FOR LETTING GO OF THEIR PERFECTIONISM
There’s no doubt that many women struggle with perfectionism. We live in a society that values achievement and often puts unrealistic pressure on women to be perfect. Whether it’s our careers, our families, or our relationships, we’re constantly striving to meet impossible standards. And while there’s nothing wrong with wanting to be the best we can be, when perfectionism starts to take over, it can have some serious consequences.
There’s no doubt that perfectionism can be a major buzzkill when it comes to enjoying sex. After all, who wants to feel like they’re being constantly judged and evaluated while trying to get intimate with someone? Fortunately, there are a few strategies that can help women let go of their perfectionism and enjoy sex more.
So read on to know can we let go of our perfectionism and enjoy better sex? Here are mentioned some of these strategies:
1. Don’t take yourself too seriously: Sex should be fun, not an opportunity to stress out about whether you look or sound perfect. So, try to relax and focus on enjoying yourself rather than worrying about how you come across.
2. Be honest with your partner: If you’re feeling self-conscious or anxious about something, tell your partner. Honesty will help them understand where you’re coming from and could make sex more enjoyable for both of you. Talk about your concerns with your partner. If you’re worried about not being good enough in bed, talk to your partner about it. Chances are they feel the same way! Having an open and honest conversation will help put both of you at ease and make sex more enjoyable.
3. Focus on the present moment: Instead of dwelling on past mistakes or future worries, try to focus on the here and now. This can help you relax and enjoy the sensations of sex without getting caught up in your head.
4. Accept that imperfections are part of life: No one is perfect, so why strive for perfectionism? Accept your flaws and learn to appreciate yourself for who you are. This will not only make sex more enjoyable, but also improve your overall wellbeing.
5. Don’t focus on the destination, enjoy the journey: Instead of thinking about all the things that could go wrong, focus on enjoying the experience of intimacy with your partner. Take your time exploring each other’s bodies and savoring every moment.
Perfectionism can be an asset in your life. Perfectionists are known for having a drive for success and high expectations for their performance in any task. When it comes to having sex, this means that we often hold back in ways that make us miss out on some incredible experiences. It is essential to let go of your perfectionism to enjoy better sex. With regard to your sex life, a little bit of anxiety is natural but don’t take yourself too seriously, be open and honest with your partner, focus on the present moment, accept that imperfections are part of life, stop the self-judgement, let go of your expectations to enjoy better sex.