How I shifted from maintaining to tending
Photo by Andrea Riondino
Welcome to my Letters
I’ve always written—songs, stories, teachings—and shared them on global stages and in boardrooms. These Letters are different: they begin here, with you. First drafted for subscribers, they carry stories, practices, and reflections you won’t find anywhere else.
In this Letter, you’ll find:
-A story: When my wellness rules stopped working.
-A practice: How to shift from maintaining to tending.
-A reflection: What neuroscience and my coaching work reveal about this shift.
-The Invitation: Watch the BTS video and join Letters for exclusive audio postcards.
-Traciana
Today’s Focus
➡ When the old wellness rules stop working, and how shifting from maintenance to tending opens the door to thriving.
The Story: The Rules That Stopped Working
For years, I believed wellness was a formula: keep moving, stay fit, push through. It worked — until it didn’t.
One afternoon, over tea with a friend, I admitted:
“Do you ever feel like the things that worked before just… don’t anymore?”
She dropped her shoulders, sighed, and said:
“Oh my god, yes. I’ve doubled down on yoga, added green juice, journaled at 5 a.m. — still, nothing’s landing.”
We laughed, but it wasn’t funny. It was recognition. The strategies we used to rely on stopped working.
What I Learned
That moment cracked something open for me: I realized I wasn’t failing at wellness — the rules themselves had become outdated.
- Maintenance treats well-being like a machine: fuel it, fix it, keep it running.
- Tending sees well-being like a garden: alive, seasonal, needing care and attention.
The first path demands perfection. The second path asks for presence.
It’s simple: Thriving isn’t about doing more. It’s about noticing when to slow down, adjust, and shift your approach.
3 Signs You’re Overwhelmed (And What to Do About It)
When you’re overwhelmed, your body is sending you signals. Here are three signs to watch for:
- Your stress system gets stuck — You’re in “fight or flight” mode, even at your desk.
Tip: Pause for five minutes of deep breathing. Reset your nervous system. - Your muscles become armor — Tension in your neck, shoulders, and back.
Tip: Stretch. Just five minutes of yoga can release tension and help your body relax. - Your digestion shuts down — Stress takes priority over digestion, causing discomfort.
Tip: Eat mindfully. Slow down and tune into your body’s needs during meals.
These are signals your body is sending that it’s time to shift. Learn more in my full blog on 9 Hidden Signs of Overwhelm.
👉 [Read the Blog Here]
The Practice: Shifting from Old Habits to Intentional Tending
I’ve seen the biggest shifts happen when high achievers recognize their old habits no longer serve them. It’s the “push-through” mentality that leads to burnout.
The shift? From maintenance to tending.
Here’s how to practice tending:
- Notice when your old habits no longer work.
- Pay attention to resistance. Where are you feeling tension or burnout?
- Replace rigid routines with something more adaptable: a walk instead of a run, a mindful meal instead of a rushed snack.
These small shifts are what allow us to thrive, instead of just surviving.
Behind the Curtain
This Letter was inspired by my very first Well-Being Diary, where I admitted: “The old rules no longer work.” That realization sparked everything.
👉 [Read the Diary Entry → Learning to Tend Instead of Maintain]
The Invitation
If this resonates with you, I created a short video to break down the tending framework I developed for Hustle Detox. I share how you can apply it to your life to create more balance.
For those already subscribed to Letters from Traciana, I’ll be sending exclusive audio postcards with real-time practices to help you apply these shifts to your daily life.
With Love & Presence,
Traciana
P.S.
I’m launching my Letters and building a community rooted in care and connection. If you’ve been enjoying this letter, I’d be deeply grateful if you’d share it with someone who might need it right now: a friend, colleague, or kindred spirit standing at their own beginning.
Just hit forward and invite them to join this growing circle of alignment and renewal.
If someone shared this with you, you can 👉 Sign Up Here. A new letter arrives every Sunday morning.
P.P.S.
For those signed up, I’ll be sending exclusive audio postcards that dive deeper into these shifts and provide you with practical tools to manage overwhelm and practice tending to your well-being — straight to your inbox. This is real-time support to help you shift from burnout to balance.
About Traciana
Traciana Graves is a globally acclaimed vocal artist, author, and alignment strategist working where sound, story, and leadership meet. Her Fearless Listening® methodology guides those navigating inflection points to cultivate self-mastery. As founder of Happiness 360, she leads immersive concerts, gatherings, and masterminds that deepen presence and flow. Her weekly Letters from Traciana and One Sound On® postcards are shared as offerings to inspire renewal, and belonging.
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